Saturday, November 30, 2013

Ode to to Commode - Number Two

Another round of horrible / weird / unusual things that happen to me in bathrooms.  Such as this:


 What is that gaping white above the toilet paper, you ask?  At eye level to you, er, sitting?  Well let me show you:


Yes, that is a PERSON.  Sitting down and trying fervently to not make eye contact.  Which is why she didn't know I took her photo.  Cause, this happened.  And it happens a lot.


See what I mean?  I not only watched several people dry their hands, I made eye contact with two who were checking if the stall was occupied.

These things also happened recently:
  • Houston, TX Saltgrass - went into bathroom, grabbed first empty stall, sat, then while doing my business, looked up.  Now there is always a gap between the door and wall.  But FOUR INCHES???  I wondered, "Can people see in as well as I can see out?"  Then I got waved at by a child.  The answer to that question is YES. (not photo above; sadly, this was another occasion).
  • A young girl showed me her new panties while I was washing my hands.  I had to agree, that, yes, those are pretty butterflies, but oh, you shouldn't pull your dress over your head like that....
  • Bathrooms at the fair differ from most public events - like LARGE HUGE SUPER SCARY BUGS that are on the ceiling!  Heard the following while in a stall:  "What's that?!?!?!  "I don't know!  Kill it!  Kill it!"   Followed by screaming and the sound of pounding on bathroom walls, shaking the entire system in the process. I didn't get a photo, but I did sit and tremble in fear that some huge bug would land on me.  Fear makes it harder to pee, FYI.
And there you have it. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.